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Selling.2.YES 

March 2019

Are you too soft?


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When I was 21, my Dad challenged my manhood and told me to my face that I was “too soft”.  It stung so hard I still remember it vividly decades later.  You’d think a life in sales would mean I would have heard it again from some half-cocked pugnacious manager, but no….I’ve never been that "fortunate".  (A few cantankerous managers have attempted to belittle me, but nobody since Dad ever called me soft.)

Which is what makes it so ludicrous that I now make the reckless assertion that you are soft!  But of course, I don’t actually know if you are or aren’t...“soft”.  Guess I'm just trying to get your attention as Dad got mine years ago.  However, given the work I’ve been doing lately with some clients, the odds are, yes indeed, you are the same as the belly of my 7-month old Vizsla puppy.

I can’t believe how soft sellers have become out there.  How’d we get here?  Not sure we should waste time answering that, so instead let’s focus on what to do to become "firmer".  Here are a few questions to ask yourself that may give insight to how aggressive you are as a sales pro: 
  • Do you go away easily when a client says “boo”!  (You know what I mean.)  Do you stand and fight when objections are presented?  Or do you flee?  Do you strategically work through the customer’s concerns and work hard to understand their professional and personal motivations? 
  • Do you quit trying to get a meeting with a prospect after two or three attempts?  
  • When a prospect says you’ve missed the planning/buying cycle, do you say something like, “ok, guess I’ll put you on my tickler for five months from now”? 
  • Are you overly concerned with how a buyer thinks of you personally? ​

...yeah, success as a B2B seller means we have to be "consultative" and "solution oriented", but that doesn't mean we peal back on the pushing, prodding and poking."  
If any of these above hits a nerve…go grab a double espresso with a shot of Red Bull and come back… ‘cuz we gots some work ta do!  

Listen, I get that success as a B2B seller means we have to be “consultative” and “solution-oriented”, but that doesn’t mean we pare back on the “pushing”, “prodding” and “poking”.  We can still be “value sellers” and “partners” and also commanding and aggressive.
 
Don’t panic.  And don’t go searching Google for the tonic that will fix it all.  Sure, there’s a lot of good in what you’re currently doing.  But the odds say....

So let's get to the solving.  Study these three suggestions and apply what feels right and you’ll be golden.  If these still don’t work, call me and I can get you and/or your team in my boot camp right away (I’ll make room):
  1. Make a commitment to be more assertive.  Is it that simple?  NO, don’t be silly.  (Man, you’re soft!)  But it starts with assessing situations where you can be more emphatic, and ultimately more assertive.  Ask yourself after every customer interaction: “Was I assertive enough?”  “Did I handle that obstacle with grace, style and verve?"  "Did I push hard enough?"  Or….did you go away too easily without probing and pushing for more info, time, and/or consideration".  What about your communication effectiveness...are your intentions clear and specifically defined?  Unless you put it on your mental road-map to be more forceful and insistent, you won’t work on it. Make the commitment to be more direct and commanding!   
  2. Are you practicing the “hard moves” enough?  …the “expert sales moves”?  I believe, unequivocally, that you will FAIL at attaining desired outcomes unless you practice, and rehearse, and plan, and practice again.  (Are you practicing at all?)  You have to critically appraise your “game” and if it’s soft in certain places, you have to work at it.  Here’s the part that is gonna sting: it doesn’t matter how good you are, or how good you think you are…you still need to practice.  (For you seasoned pros: the kind of practice you need won’t come unless you hire someone to push you.  Same concept as having a personal trainer at the gym...you're not going to do all the ab work you should do unless someone is pushing you!)  Be honest about the situations that you think require more assertiveness and think critically on how you can improve.   
  3. Develop a plan.  You can’t be confident if you’re working your work aimlessly.  Today’s business pace knocks us from pillar to post.  Without a plan, you won’t get a thing done.  Even if your plan starts simply with the top things you need to achieve this week – no matter how tactical – write 'em down and knock the items off.  A magical thing happens when you start writing plans…you not only tick off the elementary tasks, but you get bored with the easy stuff and start pushing yourself towards bigger goals.  GOOD.  Let that happen.  Knock down the easy stuff, start thinking about the hard stuff.
 
Being called “soft” is no fun.  I doubt you'll ever hear that from your manager, let alone your father.  But if you do, move past the ego damage and work the above plan.  Being assertive and resolute is not about exploiting others or being cocky, it's about being as strong as you can be with your thoughts and actions.  It’s about getting the most you can get out of your day.  Out of the week.  Out of your career and life.  Don’t settle.  Don’t be soft.
 
While you’re at it, ten sit-ups in the morning and ten push-ups a night wouldn’t hurt.  Go get ‘em.

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